To whom I may concern....

The reward of my writing I got from my colleagues is now I write and type almost all official letters. Few weeks ago, it was one of such days, when I was typing an official letter. While I was re-reading it for editing I figured that I had done a mistake with the header of the letter – “TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN”

I had left the letter ‘T’ by mistake and now it read, “TO WHOM I MAY CONCERN”

Whole sentence caught not only my eyes and attention but also my thoughts and sub-conscious mind. It somewhat echoed inside my brains – “To whom I may concern…..????”

All of us know the meaning of the above mentioned sentence. It is meant for the addressee. That the letter being sent is whole his/her responsibility and the content inside the letter matter to them and deserve their prior concern. Once the sender sends the letter, his concerns end right there and then the addressee’s concerns arise.

As I read my mistaken line, I felt myself like similar letter. But in my case, - “To whom I may concern” is not a header. It is rather a question. The answer yet to be discovered.

What are the contents in my case? My nature, my behavior, my anger, my cares, my affection and every that little thing good or bad I possess. To whom these may concern?

My book got fame. I got name. Whenever I look around myself, I come across thousands of people who are ‘interested’ in me. But not a single person ‘concerned’ to me. A lot of people are there who will willingly raise their hands up to take the credit of my success, but not a single person to hold my hand amongst my failure. A few acquaintances call me crazy for the immense planning I do before beginning any new thing. I do not feel the necessity to reply them. But if there is any reason, then it only is, that failure could make me weaker in spite of all the promises made to me during my success season. Whenever I think about anyone concerned to me, a void comes to my thoughts…

Generally you walk fast when you have to travel all alone. You know that nobody is there for your company and thus your destination gets your prime focus rather than the pleasures and enjoyments of the ways….

I never found happiness. I always created it. I never ran after laughter. Instead, I created moments to laugh. Because I know that till date, it is only myself to whom I may concern….

Unfortunately, I had taken the print out of that mistaken mistyped letter and thinking not to waste it, I had kept it in my purse for some use in future. Few minutes ago, I was looking for my pocket diary in which I had written an important scene of my second novel. I always keep this diary in my purse and as I was hunting through my purse, this piece of paper came across my hands.

Life is all about being concerned. It is most probable that in near future, in such a similar case, somebody would willingly replace the word ‘whom’ with ‘Sneha’ but I don’t know whether I would ever come across any such moment or not!

I think it is my first blog where I have opened my heart to this extent.

With my downed eyes, I am reading that mistaken header which appears as a question mark to me – “TO WHOM I MAY CONCERN…?”

Moon and I

The best part of my day starts when I come home from office. And the magical moments begin when after having dinner, I come to my study room. There are large windows in my study room which create magical path for the moonlight to enter my room. And I, sitting beside the windows, watch the moon. We talk endlessly. Sometimes, moon shifts its position from my continuous gaze to give me the clue pf the nearing dawn, so that I could have the amount of necessary sleep as per suits of my biological clock. Otherwise, my eyes refuse even to wink and lose the sight of moon for that much moment. Losing the sight of the moon could not be acceptable that easily.

Moon and I share good compatibility. Several hours we spend talking to each other. Several speechless talks... Moon also loves the night and me too... Moon was also afraid of loneliness very much and me too... But later, moon also developed affinity for this loneliness and me too... Moon sings the songs composed by the clouds. Wind makes the lyrics. Moon loves music and me too... 
Everynight, it seems as if moon covers the same path in the sky. But actually, moon is on a never ending journey. A journey which goes through new hopes every night. A journey beyond the clouds, beyond the sky, beyond the universe. Is this journey actually a search for someone? Moon doesn't reply. Neither do I...

 

Few words to share...

I was extremely disturbed last week. I blocked all the connection. I remained alone for the maximum time. I kept myself shut in my room and didn’t allow anybody to come inside. A few friends called, but I didn’t pick up my phone. I just wanted to be alone. By the end, I understood what had disturbed me that much.

Life and worries are synonym to each other. But shall we really waste our life in just worrying about everything? We get life only once. And here comes the point. I always believe that we deserve the right to live life to the fullest if we fulfill our responsibilities. And I myself have discovered some simple tips which could add extra joy to our life and make it more enjoyable than ever. So, sharing some of them with you.

1.       Get a job and balance your earnings. It is very important. You cannot always enjoy your life on your Dad’s money. Spending self-earned money just makes a way towards the bliss of life. It is quite possible that you may not get enough time to enjoy. But then, do your job like a master, not like a slave. Give importance to yourself.

2.       Make friends and enjoy with them. First and foremost – friends always add your joys. Make as many friends as you can. Make big large circle of friends. But then, sort out such friends among them, whom you love to hang out with. Plan a trip. Do what you always want to do. Watch a movie together. Never miss a chance to add some memorable moments of life. But make sure, you find friends worth being called a friend.

3.       Go crazy. You need not always be perfect. Remember the story of “Perfect Princesses”?  Sometimes perfection may cost your happiness. You need not always be perfect, idealistic or ethical. Play pranks. Tease some friend. Shout, sing, dance [even if you are a bathroom singer, consider yourself no less than anybody else]. Explore something unexplored. Do something unexpected. No matter how the person next thinks. Just go crazy sometimes.

4.       Be adventurous. Do something adventurous. Visit some unvisited places. If you think like doing something then just do it. Try to figure out adventure in every little thing you do. In my case, I make even my regular job adventurous. Whenever I do cleaning in my house, I just consider the broom the mighty sword of King Arthur and the dust around, nothing but the small mischievous imps. And whenever I clean the roof, I consider it an attack of tyrannosaurs which I have to destroy. It simply depends how you think and how you make it. Even the simple cooking can be like a victory over Troy. [Now I know what you are thinking about me – girl with broom !!! ha ha ha] 

5.       Be friendly and trustworthy with your parents. No adventure or craziness of yours can make a sense if you are not friendly and trustworthy with your parents. Remember that they are only your parents whom you can trust unconditionally and after doing all the mistakes, you can go back and expect the things to get amended just after a sorry. Plan some surprise party exclusively for your parents. Call their old friends for a get-together. Plan a religious trip and most important, never fail to praise your parents for whatever they did for you.

6.       Give surprises to siblings. Don’t forget to care for the sweetest relation of life. Tease them, pull their legs, organize occasional fights and if nothing then just keep shouting around. Don’t forget to impose your authority quite often. And by the end of the day, buy a beautiful surprise gift for them.

7.       Keep yourself away from time-pass affairs because such things not only cost your money and attention but also the most precious thing of life- time!

8.       Go for the one you love to talk with. Always prefer to such a life partner with whom you can have good conversation. Lack of conversation has been a reason for the failure of relations. Don’t hesitate to think about the one with whom you love to talk a lot. It is better if you ignore the physical appearance because it is the thing which fades with time.

9.       Jump, dance and sing around if you discover that you have started liking someone. Celebrate it. Very few people are so lucky and do be proud of yourself if you become one of them. And then, start conspiring to get him/her. Do whatever you can do to give a clue of your feelings. Don’t give up and at such time, don’t be too rationale. Just give up practicality and go crazy. Don’t give yourself a reason to mourn in future that “Had I taken that decision….” Don’t make any space for a “Kaash…” in your life. A ship is safe at harbor but it is not made for that. Enjoy the storms. Be daring enough to propose and mean whatever you say. Trust yourself and keep in your mind what Paulo Coelho has said – when you desire for something [or someone] whole-heartedly, whole world conspires to get it for you. At this stage, your friendly and trustworthy relation with your parents will help you a lot to gain that relation which could be no less than a wonderful achievement. Nothing is impossible in this world of IT Revolution and nothing is mightier than a man’s will.

10. Maintain the balance between friendship and love. I often come across such posts across facebook stating “Aaj phir pyar dosti se haar gaya..” etc etc.  I just laugh at such stupid silly things. Comparing love and friendship is just like comparing your right eye with your left eye. Nothing is more ridiculous than intermingling love with friendship and Friendship with love. None of the two can substitute the other. Love is such a strange relation in which the lesser time you spend together, the stronger the bond becomes. Friendship on the contrary, demands enough time together. The Two are complementary to each other.

11.  Get a camera and click every precious moment of your life. Make a collage. Save it either in your computer or your album. They will make the most precious memories alive.

12. Don’t ever bother about just every person. If your parents are happy with you, if your friends laugh with you, if your siblings love you and most important -if your love understands you then, you need not bother about anybody else. You cannot please everybody. Just care for the people concerned to you. Just live your life the way you love.

13. And last but not the least. Give up pretension. Don’t try to impress anybody. Just be yourself. It is all okay if you have several faults, if you are not that perfect. Just be yourself. Because it is important to get such people around you who love you as a whole. Be loyal in all your relations!

You might be thinking why I am giving such lecture! Actually, I just wanted to share my views about life and how we live it and how we make it. Some of the points may seem childish but we know how much a child  treasures happiness. The ultimate goal of all our efforts in life is only and only happiness. Then why shouldn’t we live our life such a way that we encounter happiness at every step of life! Because we get life only once!

I love rains......

I love rains. Not because of the aroma of the decent droplets.. Not because of the pitter-patter sounds of the playful puddles. Not because of the sweet touch of the melody on the skins...

I love rains because at least the sky is there to give a company to my tears....

Rains are just like the long lost desires... the unfulfilled dreams... the unaccomplished destiny... Every droplet of rains seems closer... very closer. But every effort to touch it, possess it... goes in vain.... Just like dreams.... always in heart but deprived of being in front of the eyes.... Just like a glass window... millions of raindrops on other side seem reachable but never to come in possession.... And even if i try to trap the rains in my hands... it flows away from my hands..... just like my dreams yearning to flow away through my tears....

I love rains... Rains are contagious epidemic... I love rains and run after it. I get wet and fall ill. Just like my dreams...I chase my dreams...Some of which get fulfilled leaving me to aspire for more.... Just like the rains. To get wet, fall ill and still a desperation for more....

Rains are rains. Rains are life. Rains are necessary to breathe. Rains teach to maintain a balance in life... to enjoy every moment without getting hurt or hurting someone... Rains are worthy if watched through window and loving it. Dreams make one  alive. But unaccomplished dreams hurt just like getting wet in  rains. But unaccomplished dreams hurt just like getting wet in rains. So, before dreams become an epidemic, a hurt-free assurance for life is must. I love rains because they are just like my dreams. Drenched in tears and the pitter-patter of my efforts. And in these rains of my dreams, I have umbrella of my values and morals over my head....

Some untold facts of "For what you are..."

"For what you are..." was conceptually a tragedy with the name "Puppets of destiny". The four central characters were Snigdha, Atul, Avinash and Rishabh. I had given it my heart and soul just like I do to my every story. The time I had completed it, I sent it to my friend and asked her to give her feedback and suggestions whether to proceed with it or not. She didn't reply. Three days later, I rang her up and asked about the story. She replied - "Its the cruelest story ever I read. I can't imagine that you could be so cruel to those people who happen to be characters you created. You are as callous as their destiny. The last dialogue of Snigdha disturbed me so much that I shut myself in my room and cried a lot."

Her words disappointed me too. Later, she called me again and asked to pay heed on her words. She told me that such a story will not do good with my writing start. She said that people are already facing a lots of trouble in their personal lives. They want such a story which could make them feel relaxed.

I co-incided with her words. And once again, started working on the plot. It was very hard job to do. I wiped out every negative point from the story and inserted positivity there. I added few new characters and the central thought, which was to give the negative touch to the story, came out to be positive.


And that was how, "For what you are..." finally came into existence...

Finally.....

Finally, I created my blog. It took a long time, but I eventually created it. It happens to me almost everytime. I never get anything by the mercy or grace or gift of life. I work hard restlessly to get anything. Whether be it success, happiness or yes- this blog. Always I need to put all my breathtaking efforts. I had planned this blog months ago, but again as it always happens, it took a long time to get created. I know it sounds somewhat strange, but its not the same for me. Since, now it has become a part of my life, I do almost everything restlessly- whether be it writing or working. Sometime ago, I realized that its obvious that the blog is taking so much, since it relates to my soul. And its obvious as it could be- whatever I do for myself-to get some peace of mind- it will sure take time and all my efforts. Whatever I do for myself- never gets accomplished until I just give my last breath efforts to it. Creating a blog just needs a single click and there you are. But in my case, even the simplest things come as the most complicated ones.
How ridiculous it becomes sometimes...!

"Panaah..." is somewhat strange to be a blog title, I agree. But its the perfect name when it happens to be my blog "the voice of my soul". Panaah is a Hindi word which means shelter - a place to reside safe and secure. Here my soul seeks for Panaah which it finds ultimately in "writing". Yes, its true that I breathe because I write. Because the moments which I give for writing are the most peaceful and sound moments of my day. These are the few moments when I just forget the world out there and pen down few words as to my will. And those moments only keep me merry, content and help a lot to remain calm throughout rest of the day. So, when it is concerned to me, my restless soul gets Panaah in writing...

It all started when I realized that I think too much. The reason being most of the time I used to remain alone. But I always wondered, why I think and what I think. I used to forget what I had been thinking the previous moment. And that was what caused to make me immensely restless. I wanted to recall what I had been thinking and this trial to recall always used to end up in annoyance and disappointment. I didn't get a clue of my brainstorm. Then, an idea crept inside my mind. I started noting down all my thoughts in small pieces of paper which I could always keep with myself. And thus, my thoughts started getting connected. I started feeling little relief. That was how my first scrapbook was made when I stitched all the papers together with needle and wool. I thought that I thought good. the connected thoughts were good in syllable and that was how my writing started with "ghazals". Later I wrote stories too.
Even today, it seems like I am dreaming that I have become a published author.

Black is my favorite colour. Black resembles the realities of life which I relate to. And thus, I relate to black. Black means dare...!! Dare to accept! Dare to face! Dare to express! Dare to dare... Black doesn't reflect anything. It just absorbs. It never lets anything come out. The ultimate of all colours. Which comes in the end and lasts forever.. Once anything becomes black- it can't be changed further. And even if it is tried to do so, it ruins the whole beauty. Even the black hole happens to be the most beautiful heavenly body. Thats why they named it black hole. Black hole never lets anything out once absorbed. Not even light. Black hole resembles my expectations which have got absorbed inside- never to come out. People know me the way they want me to become.
And I like the colour black. I was looking for suitable background for my blog. And when I came across this one, I didn't think twice before applying it to my blog.
And yes, no less I love the colour crimson.

Life has always come in its jumbled way. People get their degree and then do their job. I got my degree after completing two years of my job. Generally people create an internet account- connect to people and then write books. I wrote my debut novel in May 2010 and created an internet account in Jan 2011. Its all jumbled as always. "For what you are..." is a light comedy. But it was the hardest of all stories for me to write ever... Very soon, I'll tell something about it...